As mums we often find being good to ourselves a bit challenging as it can seem as bit self-centred or indulgent. How often do we put others needs before our own?

I know how often I took the burnt bits of toast, or let my son have the last chocolate, or went without the ice cream because we couldn’t quite afford one for everyone.

But developing and nurturing loving kindness towards ourselves is an important part of health, healing and happiness. So to kick-start us on that journey I’ve put together some tips you might find useful:

  1. Set an intention for each and every day. It doesn’t have to be ground-breaking. It could be as simple as making time for a coffee break.
  2. Be in nature. Take some time every day to spend some time in nature, in your garden, in a park or at the beach. Nature is very healing and soothing. It allows us to get in touch with all our senses – smell the flowers, feel the air or sun on your skin, hear the birds or the waves or watch a sunset.
  3. End all your toxic relationships. Do it now, these things drain you and make you unhappy. Anyone who doesn’t make you feel amazing doesn’t deserve to be in your life.
  4. Keep a gratitude journal – just note down at the end of each day all things that you’re grateful for however simple and small. It could be the sun shining through the window, the hugs you get from your kids, the smile you got from the lady in the shop.
  5. Move your beautiful body – getting touch with our bodies is healing and calming. Take a restorative yoga class, swim or go for a walk. Something simple and gentle. You’ll be amazed how much these can de-stress you.
  6. Learn to say NO. Remember it’s OK to do this and learn to stay within your limits. There’s no need to feel guilty and smart people know when to say no.
  7. Enjoy your food – cook a simple meal, take time to enjoy the smell and taste of your food. Or sip and savour your morning coffee and feel how this helps to focus your mind and in turn calms you down.
  8. Have a big deep belly laugh – it’s a great workout for your inner organs and the rush of good hormones will balance out the cortisol and other stress hormones and give you a real lift.
  9. Be creative even if you think you’re not the creative type – dance, sing, paint, draw, do some colouring in. Have fun doing it, release your inner-child. Doing this with your kids is a great way to have fun.
  10. Keep your inner critic at bay. Don’t let that nasty little inner voice tell you that you’re not good enough. Remember thoughts are not facts, they’re just a stream of mental events.
  11. Take some time out to calm yourself. Find time to sit quietly at some point in the day even if it’s only for 5 or 10 minutes. Connect deeply with yourself without judgement or trying to make anything happen.
  12. Be kind and patient with yourself – remember being good to yourself takes time but it’s so worth it! And remember “You are being the best you can be at this moment”.

Do you have any other tips to add to the list? Please share in the comments below.

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  • some really fantastic ideas here. some of these ideas I already utilize

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  • Great suggestions – I like the idea of a gratitude journal!

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  • I love all of these and try to practice most of them each day. I found myself stressing last night in th emiddle of the night and found reverting to my yoga breathing really helped. I give thanks every night as I’m falling asleep. I think it’s really important to be kind to yourself and to treat yourself well. It then flows to those in your family and those around you.

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  • Great tips !
    I used to do a “positive stroke” book. I collected and kept all the kind postcards and messages people wrote to me in a bundle, together with things I wrote down myself I was thankful for. Add the drawings and love notes of your kids and you’ve got a beautiful bundle what will always touch your heart.
    Be kind to yourself ! Take a tanning bed or a massage when you have the money. And when you don’t, see if your partner or one of your friend can do a massage. Of course going to the hair dressers, the beauty salon, the pedicure or the nail bar can be a nice treat as well.
    Go to the sports club, visit the sauna, read a book or meditate can all help to fill that battery and not to forget a daily nap !

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  • Great suggestions and very positive.

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  • I love these suggestions. I’m so terrible at taking care of myself but I think these small changes could make a big difference. I’m looking forward to trying a few out.

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  • I always enjoy reading new articles that helps promote a healthy life and wellbeing, thank you.

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  • Very important to take care of ourselves. I enjoy reading for example. Every evening I go to bed and I read for at least half an hour. It has the same effect that meditation has to other people. We just need to find what works for us. :-)

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  • the comments are providing many more great tips. thanks all

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  • I really appreciate reminders like this to look after myself! Tomorrow I’m going to do some gardening, definitely true that we need to keep in touch with nature!!

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  • These are fantastic tips

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  • These tips make perfect sense. I would also add: smile even when you are not in the mood because your mood will soon catch up :-)

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  • i just loved these tips- so utterly do-able and would make the world of difference to one’s feelings of self-worth. Thank you so much for sharing Clarissa :-)

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  • Great list. I love “thoughts are not facts”. Really resonated with me.

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  • It is amazing how us Mums can often put ourselves so far down the list.
    I am very much focusing on the fact that I am important too.

    Reply

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