After time, and with our busy schedules these days, it gets hard to sometimes get in the mood. 

Getting in the mood is about your mindset, 95% of it is all in our heads. So, lets clear our heads with some amazing FREE natural body chemical release tips.

TIP 1. Hit the gym

Let’s be honest, as women we have some serious body issues. With the majority of women refusing to have sex with the lights on, we feel we need to feel good about our body image before we let anyone close.

It doesn’t matter whether you’re a size 8 or size 22, never had a baby or had a tribe, women are image conscious.

I myself was not happy with the changes in my body during my mid 30’s and I’m a small build.

I realised that unconsciously it was messing with my head and had to do something about it. Off I went to the gym to do a little Pilates and before I knew it I felt better and was happy to not only get naked in front of someone, but got upset when he turned the lights off!

The gym helps to release feel good endorphins into your system, which actually makes sex appealing all of a sudden.

You start to feel better and your self-esteem increases and you start tapping into your inner sex goddess.

Now I want to state here for all those ‘lights off’ women, I read an article written by a man recently about this topic and women’s paranoia with their body image and making love.

He stated, “Men don’t care what you look like. They are just happy you’re letting them touch you!”

TIP 2. Get the housework done

So the biggest distraction when attempting to be intimate with your partner and the biggest reason women don’t reach the Big ‘O’, is that instead of concentrating on the job on hand, you are too busy thinking about all the things you still haven’t done, all those niggling tasks and chores of the day.

Tip – if your not relaxed you won’t reach orgasm. So, get all your chores done (or make it clear to your partner that if they want some bootie time they need to help you with this list) and then sit back and relax.

Sex and orgasms are actually an amazing stress relief!

TIP 3. Check the temperature

What? I here you say. A study done in the Netherlands actually proved that women having cold feet during sex could actually hinder her orgasm!

By just adding socks to female subjects, orgasms increased from the original 50% to a massive 80% of subjects!

So make sure you haven’t just set the scene with a relaxing atmosphere that includes both the lighting and music (ambience) but maybe have a relaxing bath together (or shower) and slap on a pair of socks!

TIP 4.  30 second rule 

Now get close. Studies have shown that holding your partner close for 30 seconds triggers the release of oxytocin, the hormone that emboldens trust and sexual desire between intimately familiar people.

Then, make sure you take a deep breath. Inhaling your partners scent usually acts as an aphrodisiac. Mmmmmmm

TIP 5.  5 minute rule

Now we are ready for that 5 minute deep passionate kiss. Kissing releases adrenaline, and endorphins that are 200 times more powerful than morphine.

It’s a relaxant, stress reliever, great for your general health and the ultimate way to get an awakening stir in all the right bits!

TIP 6. 10 minute rule 

Now, if you’re still saying that hasn’t worked its time for the 10 minute rule. Even if you’re not in the mood, give yourself 10 minutes to give intimacy a shot.

That time gives your body a chance to catch up to what your mind is wanting, sex. It works!


  • Great tips! I never would have thought about the cold feet thing.

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  • Some great tips there, thank you.

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  • I am always soooo tired. As soon as I lay down, I can nearly fall asleep. I love that my hubby initiates sex 99.9% of the time. I used to, but various medications mean my libido is shot. Once I get started, I’m fine, but I feel like I’ve lost that spontaniety and ability to initiate.

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  • I can relate to the cold feet and good sex with cold feet doesn’t work indeed !

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  • I have to agree with the stress relief. The old headache excuse….is a myth! Fix your headache by having sex, it works

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  • I find if things in general are good between hubby and myself, then good sex naturally follows. If things aren’t do good, then sex suffers too

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  • so really you are suggesting to force yourself for 10 mins? tip no 6


    • Yeah, I found that one a bit bizarre too !

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  • thanks for sharing these tips

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  • Yup to rule 6! Low libido and a child too, give it some time and hanky panky and you can flip that switch!

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  • oh please i need tips to get HIM in the mood for sex, he has such a low sex drive :(

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  • Great tips Ill be sure to use them. luv the sounds of tip 4. ;-)

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  • Good tips ;-) thanks

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  • Some great tips for getting in the mood ;)

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  • Love the 10 minute rule. And as for the socks….I use a heat pack (wheat bag) to warm my tootsies!

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  • Yep, weight on, lights off……


    • If your partner asks for the lights off then thats the ONLY time he is not attracted to you and your body. So if he hasn’t said a word then you need to LET GO of thinking your not sexy and ENJOY!

    Reply

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