I did and I regret it. I wish I did it all my way, or the way that I felt was right. Now I am having problems with my daughters developmental delay toilet training etc, I wanted to start very early when my daughter was telling me and they advised against it. That’s just one problem I’m dealing with!

Has anyone else felt like this?



Biostime


Posted by shelley shelley, 2nd April 2015


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  • I followed most of their advice but sometimes I didn’t if my instincts felt it wasn’t the right thing to do.



  • some of it – I had common sense on my side – my mum, cousins and aunts, so listened to all and did what felt right. my son slept on his tummy and had toys in his cot.. that goes against the grain too. He survived. all the best



  • I would not have survived motherhood if it weren’t for the baby childhood clinic help when my kids were born ( mainly it was for my first one when you are nervous for being a first time mother ) . I think toilet and cot training are two of the most complex tasks to master for mum and child and I was fortunate to get a Dr Chrstopher Green toddler book as it was suggested by someone . Of course theory is easier than practise and I was lucky I had a lot of good advice from the centre . In your case , maybe just play it buy ear and tell your daughter go when she is ready to go and let her have the choice first so that she can make a decision without stress. I also used toilet pants in case accidents happen as well.



  • Absolutely not. I found them to be bossy and everything had to be their way. Made me feel like a bad mother on a number of occasions because I was doing something they didn’t agree with, or wasn’t their way. Made me very upset and stressed. I found a lot of what they say to be old fashioned and at the end of the day, MUMS know best!



  • I think it’s tough when it’s your first & having had a special needs first I did not have visits with a health nurse, just lots of specialists so when number two came along I was confident & knowledgable with a good support network so I could take or leave maternal health advice. Alot of it was great advice and some didn’t suit or sit right. I think listen to your instincts, mum often knows best & if you’re unsure always seek a second opinion. It’s such a shame this happened but sharing this question is a great conversation starter. Good luck with the toileting, my daughter was hard work in this department :p



  • If it was medical or health related, I would listen to the nurse with mostly no questions. If it’s a developmental issue, I would be inclined to follow my heart, as I deal with bub on a day to day basis do I would know them best and what they’re capable of.



  • I just always tell them what they want to hear



  • I took advice from them but sometimes I didn’t follow it if it didn’t feel right. I used my gut instinct as I know my Bub better than them. Some things were useful and helped but lost of the time it was old fashioned advice.



  • I say go with your gut! always trust your own instincts. I happily listened to what the Child Health nurses had to say but then I made my own decision based on what was right for bub and right for me…… sometimes mummy just knows best :-)



  • poor you I hope that you managed to get her toilet training sorted soon.



  • Thanx to all the mums who have given me advice on this subject. I really appreciate it. :-)



  • I took advise from the nurse and everyone else but I did want felt right in the end. Trust yourself as you know your daughter and family best



  • Hell Yes i Listened the her advise but didnt follow what she said at all, the only good thing that came from the health nurse was the Mother group she created by the first time mums groups she created for us. She had a way of making us ALL feel inadiquite and like bad mums as we were all so unsure of ourselves doing the right thing. We all at first thought everything she said was right that was till we kept meeting after the inititial 8 first time meetings and decided to stay in touch and compared notes and 7 years later we rely one eachother for advise above all other advise. Now with your following kids unless you ask they dont push you one way or the other. Which is good as they know you know what you are doing. The best advise is let your kids guide you. You as the mum knows when something is wrong with your child and whats best. It took me three years before even the doctors ageed with me my oldest had issues and was able to get professional help with it, I had a gut feeling from the time he was one something wasnt right. But with following kids they seem to take your word for it and you can get help much sooner as i have disscovered. Goodluck and believe in yourself you do know whats best for your child you want whats best for it, even at time if you just need to be encouraged that what you are doing is right. Just ask the right people and the support will be there. It wont be as hard with future kids as you ” Already have a child ” Health nurses etc treat you differently for some reason.



  • I think you can take on board what others say ,buy gut instinct is the best ,if child tells u maybe should listen ,they know it feels yucky wet etc



  • I found the child health nurses to be far more useful and informative than GPs when it came to most non-medical issues about my kids’ development, but I also always sought other sources of info and made up my own mind about things. It’s hard, I know, when you get professional advice that you don’t think is right for your family. I think you become more confident with second and subsequent kids and it’s easier to pick and choose which advice you follow. All the best.


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