New dad left devastated after his wife unexpectedly kicked him out of the delivery room while she gave birth.

The anonymous man shared on Reddit how he missed the birth of his daughter and it has been weighing on his mind for months.

‘My wife gave birth to our daughter three months ago,’ he posted.

‘I was always looking forward to witness her birth. My wife and I agreed that it would be an exclusive moment between us,’ he said.

He said he didn’t know ‘what came over her’, but just as she was about to deliver, she told him she didn’t want him there.

‘I was really surprised and asked her why.

‘She told me that she didn’t want me to see her like that and when I told her it’d be alright, she asked the nurse to kick me out.’

The man said she said she just wanted her mother there, and as a result ‘I just ended up missing the most important event in my life.

‘I just couldn’t do anything. I just cried and sucked it up,’ he said.

While he said he never ‘expressed’ his ‘displeasure’, the man said he is still ‘devastated’ about it and he is planning to tell her.

He asked for advice as to whether he should ask her, or if he should keep it to himself. Admitting it is really taking a toll on their relationship and they are considering time apart.

WIBTA of I tell my wife that I don’t want to go out on any dates because she decided at thw last moment that I shouldn’t be witnessing the birth of our daughter? from r/AmItheAsshole

Tough situation! I can certainly understand why she may have changed her mind during labour. It is all so very unexpected and terrifying at the time. She probably just really wanted to save him the stress.

What would you do in this situation?

Share your comments below


  • That’s pretty sad. I think the dad has a right to witness the birth of his baby. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind seeing her like that, he would just be focussed on getting that bsby out.

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  • Let her recover first but he should gently bring it up with her and discuss it

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  • He needs to talk to her about this. Harboring resentment could be very detrimental to their marriage.

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  • He absolutely needs to discuss this with her. Nobody can control the emotions and situation of giving birth. It’s a very personal situation. However, if this festers, he could lose his marriage over it. It needs to be talked through.

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  • He needs to discuss this with his wife or it could have a detrimental effect on their marriage. I would have preferred my husband with me than my Mother.

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  • I hope that he can talk with her about this and not harbour resentment.

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  • I think she mustn’t feel completely comfortable around him, like he would’ve been disgusted at the sight of her going through that. He obviously did not feel that way at all, but his wife had such anxiety anyway. I wonder if something triggered it in either that relationship or a past one for her.

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  • Very sad for him, maybe they could consider counselling.

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  • If you have a good strong relationship you should want your partner there. I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I feel completely comfortable with mine.

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  • Oh that’s tricky…

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  • Ummm poor guy. Sorry but its his moment too. I dont believe in the whole its her body thing. They entered this journey together. Its the most important bonding moment. Id tell her how much she hurt him. Maybe she already feels bad. And the next one will be different? I loved my husband witnessing the birth. He didnt want to at first as he thought he would pass out and then was so involved on the day it was so amazing

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  • Hard one, its a time for them to feel important too soi think it just needs to be discussed by both parties

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  • Do feel for this dad. Sounds like it could be the final straw that breaks up this couple’s marriage. Even if he tells her how unhappy and upset he is, nothing can alter the situation, and it could very easily make it worse.

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  • It should have been a moment between the three of them, father, mother and daughter, and really her mother should not have been there unless the two of them agreed upon that. He was duck shoved and her mother was preferred over him. If she was worried about him seeing her lady parts, well then, it’s a bit too late for that. He would have seen her down there many times as they obviously had a sexual relationship. For Pete’s sake, how does she think she got pregnant, not by mind control, that’s for sure. How awful and heart wrenching for this dad. Yes, he was entitled to be there, he is 50% of the reason she was conceived and born and he had every right to be there, even if he was comforting his wife or mopping her brow. It will be hard for him to get over, I know that would if it happened to me, and I hope he doesn’t get resentful towards her, although I could see how he could. He needs to find the right time and I do believe that the situation needs to be addressed. She needs to know how much she hurt him and took away the most wonderful moment of his life, seeing the miracle of his daughter’s birth, instead of sending him away because she was concerned about him looking at her the wrong way. That’s like silly women who wear make-up to bed because they don’t want their husband or partner to see what they look like without it. Strange…I encourage him to speak to her as his wife needs to know the damage she has done to him emotionally and how broken-hearted he felt and how he is still continuing to struggle with the deprivation he experienced by not be allowed to be there. He will never get that moment back and if he is allowed into the next birth, (that’s if they stay together), then that could help ease the pain, but will never, ever really change the initial disappointment of the first birth. How sad for him that she so carelessly had him removed from the room, without regard for the damage that she has no idea she would do to him. Yes, man, find the time and the strength to speak to her, it will be important for your emotional and physical wellbeing. I hope you get through this okay. Be brave.

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  • Yeah. Dads rights. It is sad. Yes, woman carrying the baby but he is dad. Even to be in there up by her side, not necessarily down business end of things.

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