I don’t know if I’m the only one who does this – or there is a certain breed of personalities that get caught in the trap of over committing their time?

I have to admit I am a shocker!  From the simplest thing like getting ready to go to town. I could decide I’d like to leave the house by 8:30am – the few things I need to do to “be” ready –doesn’t actually take that much time. I can be up at 6am and still be late!

I get caught in the other menial tasks I set myself which I think should be done before I go. Tidy the kitchen, put some washing on, wipe the fridge out (nothing at all that contributes to me actually getting to town and all stuff that can wait until later when I have no other commitments) but still, I scurrage around until 8.25am then in that last 5 minutes try to get dressed, get the kids dressed, change nappies, pack lunches/drink bottles, handbag, list, phone, toys whatever and then try to juggle all these things out the door to the car!

Getting frustrated, tense and anxious in the meantime; it’s not a very nice last 5 minutes! Finally (being approx half an hour behind schedule) I’m in the car and on my way –cursing myself at being so hopelessly dis-organised ALL the time (you probably think I’m crazy!). This is a habit my husband can’t stand and reminds me of all the time. So as much as I think I’m trying to be better at it, reality is, I keep repeating the same old patterns – over committing my time. Now in attempt to impress my husband (after 7 years of marriage!), I’ve decided to take a good hard look at when and why I do this and how I can enduringly improve.

A little investigation led me to realise that it’s an adrenaline addiction. If I’m not flat-out busy, I don’t feel worthy. In other words being early or sitting around with time to spare is never an option for me. If things are running smoothly, I rough it up. If something is simple, I complicate it. Sounds a bit crazy I know. This is me!

So with other commitments –like work and family, I seem to carry over these same traits. Filling up every second of every minute of every hour and sometimes resulting in getting NOTHING done and EVERYTHING half started and being physically and mentally drained.

I tend to do a whole lot of nothing, then I try to multi-task a whole lot of everything at once which is very rarely successful!

Ok, so I take a look at my schedule – I’m not THAT busy. How does the day get away so wasted?

For some reason I decide all these things that need to be done- then expect that they should all be done at ONCE and everything should be perfect and whatever else pops up can go away or wait or tag along at the bottom of my list. I am a list person. I always jot down what I need to get in town, what I need to do today, what needs to be done around the house, things I’d like to buy, places we can go, people we can see, things we can do. I feel the need to write all these things down. Then the “list” gets lost/buried somewhere and I carry on creating more lists. Not knowing where to start or how I will ever finish everything on the list. Still sounding a bit crazy I know. This is me!

Back in the days of growing up, I remember we used to get bored. In general, people had time to spare. Time to waste. Time to be creative, use our imagination. Time to reflect on memories with family and friends. Now we all have a diary. We schedule in meetings. We constantly play phone tag or email ping-pong or text relays. Everyone is sooooo busy. Have we overcommitted because of the “want it all NOW” society we are becoming? I don’t really know. I’ll never know all the answers to my questions but I feel it is very imperative that we ask ourselves “does it really matter?” Is what you are doing right now contributing in some way to the quality of your life? Is there something else you could be doing?  I know I quite often have to remind myself to focus on the task at hand. With so much else floating around in my mind, my attention is often distracted to the next task or another list. I have to bring myself back to the moment. Be where I am right now. Get on with the job and steadily move onto the next thing. I’ve learnt multi-tasking doesn’t work.

If you’re going to commit your time to a task COMMIT TO IT wholly. It’s the only way.

Do you over commit your time? Share your tips with us on how you manage the day to day!


  • I hate it when people are late! I am always early and think everyone is capable of that and should show the same courtesy I do, rather then keep others waiting

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  • No, not me, hubby is a shocker though! No matter how much time he gives himself, he’s always late. So frustrating

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  • A very interesting article! Thanks for this read!

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  • Yes sometimes I feel like a hamster on a wheel

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  • yeah i know! sometimes i just get so bogged down with stuff.

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  • Thanks again for sharing; have shared with friends in need!

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  • Thanks for sharing this interesting article; some good points.

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  • i did a time journal for a week to see where my time went, I them changed the way I do a few things and it has been amazing for me. Now I am more often than not on time and no where near as rushed as I was

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  • Loved this article, couldn’t agree more, if you are to commit to something DO IT, 100%, no excuses. :)

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  • I just had a disagreement with my husband because I hadn’t put the folding away today — don’t get me wrong, he’s not a dictator or anything, but I said I’d try to do it today and instead actually took a little time to have a sleep while our Naughties were having their nap as I’ve been so exhausted lately! Some things wait until the next day, most things I do when I can but he gets annoyed if I don’t work to his preferred timeframe. But my goodness I get a hell of a lot done in the 30 mins before we have visitors!

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  • I have learnt that I can always do it tomorrow.

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  • Hi, well I’m 57yrs old I have spinal stenosis, and just last year I had both my hips replaced, so now in have titanium rods for hips, which have allowed me to walk again, but it’s not as good as they say it was going to be.:( I still can’t bend down to pick things up off the floor, I can use a pick up stick but it is not any good for anything heavy to pick up, so it either has to stay there, or hope that someone will call in Nd I take that opportunity to ask them for help to pick things up for me. I still cannot put socks and shoes on either, so it’s slippers at home or push on shoes without socks on when I go out. I also have y oldest grandson who is 16 yrs old in September living with me permanently and he is Autistic, and bi polar. He goes to school all day and as soon as he gets home he jumps on the PC and that’s him till I nag at him to get off by 10.30pm to get some sleep to get up for school in the mornings (that just doesn’t happen :() he is no trouble to me but he also is no help to me either, not without a huge fight to get him to do anything other than be on the PC that is. I have to wake up at 7.00 am every morning and argue with him for the next hour trying to get him up for school, then he is always late and we live across the road from the school.
    I have worked all my life until the car accident that changed my life for good, I lost my husband of 25 yrs and ended up disabled as well. I struggled with bad depression for 10 yrs then finally came out of it and moved on with my life. I got a one bedroom unit from dept of housing moved in and was quite contented with what life I had. Then it all changed……
    I took in my grandson, because he was a runaway and had been through hell because of abusive father and step mother who didn’t understand his Autism, and just kept hitting him and treating him like a dummy so didn’t teach him everything that we all try to teach our kids about growing up and what they have to learn to become a part of a functioning family member. He tried living with his mother and her husband and his other siblings 4 of them of which one is also Autistic worse than he is, but the busy lifestyle they live by he just couldn’t cope with that being so use to it just being himself due to no family inclusion with his father etc. so my daughter asked me if I could take him for a holiday for not only a break for him but for her too as he doesn’t sleep very much at all, and so as a good parent she couldn’t sleep knowing that he was awake and not in bed asleep like the other kids were.
    I picked him up from the airport for a two week holiday with me before he was to start school, he was with me for 4 days, and asked me if he could live here with me. After many many discussions with my daughter and her husband, we decided to give it a go to see if it would be better for him, and also my daughter thought that he would be of assistance to me too to help with the things that I couldn’t do for myself. WRONG………
    Talk about being disorganized and getting no time to get things done, no sleep, and being so tired all the time I am going through it all over again.
    I also help my elderly Neighbour by cooking for her, as she was like a skeleton with skin on it, poor thing wasn’t eating properly and she was so sick she could not do much other than to sit in a chair or lay down in bed.she does have people come in 3 times a week to shower her, and twice a fortnight to do domestic help for her, but believe me they are a total waste of time effort and money as they just skim over things and leave. I could not in good conciseness, go over next door to visit her and see the poor old lady in that situation and not do something to help her. It started off with me cooking her dinner for her to help build up her strength and her health, then I showered her the days the other days they didn’t do, cause I couldn’t see her without getting a daily shower at her age, then I cleaned up for her where the others missed doing things she wanted and needed done, because they said it wasn’t in their job description to do ( bloody waste of money for what they did do which wasn’t much at all )
    She was so sick the other day that when a new lady came to shower her, that she knocked on my door and asked me if I could go over to see her seen as she had never been there before, so didn’t know how bad she was. Well she was bad, so I had to call an ambulance to come and take her to hospital, contact her daughter who works to tell her about her mum, organize her and things to send her off in the ambulance. After all that drama I then stayed at her place and cleaned it all over the right way, it took me all day cleaning g her house for her to come home to, then I had to go home when my grandson came home from school, and doing all this I still didn’t get anything done at my place, and what a mess I had in there.
    I have been offered a transfer to a two bedroom place because of my grandson needing his own room, so I am trying to pack up my unit for the move when that happens ?? I am on urgent priority for a transfer when something becomes available, but with only me to do the packing, the unit was or is full of boxes I’ve managed to pack up already, plus all the disruption to the place while I am packing, so I got nothing done at all. Neither did I get any help from my grandson either I really think some days I will go crazy lol……
    So it doesn’t matter if your children are babies, toddlers, or school age, you still have so many disruptions in your day, and can’t get them all done. You or me are not super women, I often wish I was like genie or Samantha from bewitched and wiggle my nose and it gets done, but alas that it dreaming big time. lol
    So talking about trying to get so many things done I the time that you have when you are awake just does not happen, and I’m proof of that I’ve been there done that and now doing it all over again makes me wonder if it will ever slow down and let me rest and sleep.
    I have just received a phone call from my Neighbour to go over and shower her she has a doctors appointment this afternoon, her daughter is coming to take her to it, and I woke up with a shocking dose of the flu and feel like I have been dragged home by the cat……so tired…. Please God give me the strength to get through the day and manage to get some sort of order in my day so I can go to bed and try to get some sleep??? Sorry about my rantings but just wanted to let all you young mothers out there that are tired can’t get on top of your housework, shopping, cleaning, washing cooking etc, that even when you are old and should be able to slow down life just doesn’t let that happen…………
    Please dear God give me the strength to get through all this before I do go crazy…………….lol
    Thanks for reading my chaotic life but now that your not alone with your struggles either
    Best of luck and I sincerely wish you god speed and time on your side to get things done that need done, and pray that you finally get a good nights sleep to face the next day.
    Thanks Josie Dunning xxx

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  • thanks for sharing with us :)

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  • Definitely sounds familiar … One of the things that helps me to keep more work-life balance and be calmer is that our son Cameron’s mood is directly related to mine. If I’m in a hurry – he feels hurried and stressed and usually acts out. If I’m calm and leave enough time for bed or getting ready for school – he is generally calm, but even if he’s not – I can manage the situation better. I’ve fallen into the ‘rush, rush, overscheduled trap’ lots of times – but history shows me it never makes me or anyone else in the family feel good. I want to be a good role model for Cameron and that inspires me to slow down! Thanks for the article.

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  • I am so guilty of this. Need to change :(

    Reply

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